My Name is Janiel. And I am A Solar Flare.

This is an actual Solar Flare.Yep. If you stared at the sun through a telescope, this is what you'd see.

My friend Robin once referred to herself as a Solar Flare.

I hearted that so much because it is EXACTLY how I feel about myself. And until Rob offered that description, I sort of figured I was the only such Flare-y person out there. Yea and Verily, the pain was great and terrible. But now that I know there is another such personage, I wonder if perhaps we are also not alone.  Maybe. PLEASE LET IT BE THAT WE ARE NOT ALONE.

Being a Solar Flare is a pain in the sunspot. It ruins my life on a daily basis. I don't want any of you to suffer from that. So on the off chance that there are more of us out there, and you simply don't realize what your problem is, I shall now post a list of Solar Flare symptoms. And that way even if you can't do anything about it, at least you'll know what to blame everything on: "I can't help it! I'm a Solar Flare! The technical term is Painus in Buttoxis! Deal with it!" 

Here you go. Symptoms of Painus in Buttoxis Syndrome:

• Having jittery impatient feelings when other people don't figure things out quickly enough. Especially with stuff you know more about than them but are too polite to say something.
• Going ahead and saying something.
• Regretting it like crazy until you can drown your mortification in a cuppa cocoa with a splash of orange, at which time you go into paroxysms of delight over the divinity of cocoa and orange and forget what you were upset about.
• Being very proud of yourself for remembering to visit a friend who is sick. Being prouder still as you are very careful to listen, listen, listen, AND ask very detailed questions of your friend to show your interest. Continuing to show interest. A LOT. Showing interest as friend stands, grabs your arm, and guides you out the door. Quickly. With rather wild eyes. Thinking that friend should go see a doctor.
• Saying "I can fix that!" "I can make that!" "I don't need help!" before every project and not bothering to read instructions or analyze things first, only to have to start over 47 times and then throwing the project against the wall.
• Gently sitting your children/students/young charges/husband down to tell them things that are essential to their happiness and well-being, then noticing they are no longer sitting in the chair in front of you. You look around and find them pasted to the back wall. When they tell you you were a bit, er passionate about it, you have no idea what they're talking about.
• Talking on the phone with the mother of your kid's new friend, and being friendly and chatty and charmingly funny, to, you know, get to know her. Make her comfortable with you. Then finding her getting quieter and quieter until by the end of the call you're the only one talking. You have to call 6 times before new friend has an open slot in his schedule to play. That is one popular kid!

See? Sound familiar? If so, then YOU, like ME are a Solar Flare. And I AM NOT ALONE IN THE WORLD! ALSO, NEITHER ARE YOU! WE ARE NOT ALONE! WE SHOULD HAVE PARTIES WHERE WE PLAN STUFF AND GET STUFF DONE AND SOLVE ALL THE WORLD'S PROBLEMS AND BAKE LOTS OF COOKIES AND EAT THEM, WHICH HAS NOTHING TO DO WITH BEING A SOLAR FLARE I JUST LIKE COOKIES. ESPECIALLY CHOCOLATE CHOCOLATE CHIP. AND THEN WE SHOULD GET EACH OTHER'S NUMBERS AND PROMISE TO CALL EACH OTHER BUT BE SO BUSY BEING A SOLAR FLARE THAT WE DON'T HAVE TIME. AND THEN WE CAN DO IT AGAIN NEXT YEAR! DEAL?

DEAL-A-ROONIE, BABES! DEAL-A-ROONIE!