"Wait, wait. Let me see your tongue."
"Why?"
"Just show me. AAAAAAHHH! It's forked! I knew it! It's forked."
"No it's not!"
"Let's see who can stick their tongue out the farthest."
"I'll win."
"I'll win."
"I won't, I had to have that thingie clipped because I was tongue-tied. I haven't learned to stick it out yet."
"Let's take a picture!"
"Dude. You have a mustache. You do! It's awkward. It's a little baby mustache."
"Well I don't. Feel this! Clean shaven. Have been for years."
"You're a girl."
"Exactly."
"Stop making fun of my mustache."
"Take a picture!"
"Wait. Mom's in the background. Mom! Stick your tongue out as far as it will go!"
"Bleeeaaaaaahhhhh."
"I'm going to bed."
"Sorry I made comments about your 'stache."
"It's fine."
"Good night, my brother, forgive me pleeeease . . ." [Sung to the tune of "Goodnight My Someone" from The Music Man] "I did not mean to be mean, you seeeee . . . "
"Wow. Look at this picture of me. I look like I have a man-wig on."
"Hahahaha! It's creepy."
"In elementary school I used to always say [in an affected English accent] 'Murder! Murder in the bathroom!'"
"Wow."
"And my friend said that was creepy."
[cricket, cricket, cricket]
"1. 2. 3. NINJA STRIKE!!!"
[In affected slow motion] "WWWWWhhhhoooooaaa NNNNooooooooo!!!!!"
"Omigosh! I look like Professor Umbridge in this picture!"
"Waaa hahahaha!"
"If I swallowed a chunk of frog, this is what I would look like."
"HAH! *snort* I'm sorry! I have a problem with snortage when I laugh."
"WE SHOULD TAKE SNORTING PICTURES!"
"Okay! One, two THREE. *snort snort, weeee weeee!"
"*Wee wee snort!*"
[click, click]
"You sound like a cat going through the garbage disposal."
"You sound like a bison."
Please. Help me. I'm trapped at my in-laws with a bunch of kids and cousins.
It's been like this the entire weekend.
I can't wait until the Holiday is over.
Sort of.
🙂
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